Comments on the week from our expert panel of reporters, bankers, doctors, lawyers, ad wizards, lawn guys, bond guys, car guys, pilots, priests, principals, builders, teachers, bums, and nomads.
Continually updated throughout the day...
Jeff G's weekly picks:
UND - I want to be wrong
BYU - Southpark said that the Mormons are the true religion, so I have to give them the nod over that sinner Nutt.
LSU - I can't pick a team with unis as terrible as Oregon. That comment is limited to the football players only. Their cheerleaders are properly attired.
UGa – Besides Clemson, UGa has been my biggest nemesis over the years. No matter how I pick them, I usually lose. Therefore I respectfully request that UGa and Clemson be removed from all subsequent games here. Thank you for your consideration. I look forward to your reply.
Maryland - Count me among those taking pleasure in Miami's recent unpleasantness. Hopefully that will manifest itself on the field.
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This was hard to choose for the opening 1st week. I see your rep is still strong for 2011/12. I think I might add tudors to the School of Noise this season. -- School of Noise
The BYU Honor Code will be put to the test in the Grove. -- Brendan
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Faldon's Five More Thoughts:
Notre Dame - That laughter you hear is the Golden Domers' response to being asked to join the LonghornSooner Conference.
BYU - Those Mormons ... err, Latter Day Saints ... can ball.
Oregon - Bigger detriment to LSU's chances this week than the QB being suspended? Artifical turf prevents Les Miles from having a pregame snack.
Boise State - Did you know Boise State has a Chick-fil-A on campus? And it's the only CFA in the entire state?
Maryland - Which campus suffered more damage? Maryland from Hurricane Irene or Miami from Hurricane Nevin Shapiro? Oh, and "Homicide: Life on the Streets" > "CSI: Miami"
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Boise State airs it out over Georgia, Georgia blames the uniforms (34-31 Boise) -- Jeremy A.
Considering the fact that there are two more nights available to party and the word is that Dallas has some clubs, I am reluctant to pick oregon-LSU prior to the deadline, but I will abide by the rules. Just think there should have been a waiver on this game until 6:45 saturday night. -- Dean of Sportswriters
And so it begins... all the choices, deleting the choices and going with the other, then calling yourself dumb and "going with your gut" then losing the game anyway - 5 months of second guessing and remorse, handfuls of "what if" and "if I only had", finding yourself asking your customers "can I get you another beer and, by the way, who do you like in the Notre Dame/USC game (and keeping a mental score card for the e-mail to be sent later) - damn, I have missed this... -- Dave M.
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The System
By Glenn B.
I determined this week's picks by running the games through my new custom app NCAAFConverter, which converts and translates any given matchup to an equivalent relationship in a wholly unrelated field. I'm still working a few bugs out of the system but here is what NCAAFConverter has come up with so far:
1. South Florida - Notre Dame (USF worth four points)
NCAAFConverter : Leprechaun riding mechanical bull, and we all know how that will end. So I'll take South Florida and the bonus points, thank you very much. (My only concern here is that NCAAFConverter did yield an alternative outcome: Leprechaun slamming Red Bull, and if this second conversion is the right one, then my pick is DOOMED.)
2. BYU - Ole Miss
NCAAFConverter: Black Bear versus cougar! And we all know how that will end. So in the interest of seeing if my faith in NCAACFConverter is well placed, I'll go against my gut and take Ole Miss, thank you very much. (Actually, I was too impatient to wait for the video to load so I just scanned the comments; this one is representative: "Black bear uses swipe! But it missed! Cougar uses slash! But it's not very affective. Cougar flees! Black bear gained 32 exp.") (Interestingly, on this one, NCAAFConverter yield two alternative outcomes: Col. Reb versus cougar, and: shark versus cougar, so apparently my Ole Miss pick is solely attributable to UM's choice of a stupid black bear as its new, non-racist mascot.)
3. Oregon - LSU
NCAAFConverter: 555 South Eugene is WINNING! in Baton Rouge! You know you are ready to make an offer so act now!
So I'll take Oregon, thank you very much.(NCAAFConverter really had a hard time with this one; it kept substituting the Auburn Tiger for LSU's Bengal Tiger, yielding a consistent Tiger win but only so long as the Tiger squad was adequately compensated.)
4. Boise State - Georgia
NCAAFConverter: Buttercup cruising Manhattan in a sweet '73 Ford Bronco. Actually, I don't know how this one will end. I'm sorry, I hate to go against an SEC team, but with a name like Buttercup, and taking into account the possible infallibility of NCAFConverter, I have to go with the (sweet) Bronco; so I'll take Boise State, thank you very much.
(P.S., Mark Richt, don't feel bad when UGA VII (?) terminates your contact by peeing on it at the end of this season; you are a quality coach and you will find there's a bright future ahead of you in the Big East or ACC.)
5. Miami - Maryland
NCAAFConverter: Diamonback terrapins released into hurricane-ravaged salt marsh, and we all know how that will end (SARCASM). Actually, I'm sorry, maybe I launched NCAAFConverter too early because I have no clue what this means. Is this terrapin over hurricane because the reintroduction of these baby turtles into the marsh shows the resiliency of the species? Or is the main point that the hurricane slaughtered so many turtles in this marsh that now scientists are having to bring them in via bucket brigade? So I am going with my gut on this one, I'll take Maryland and the bonus point, thank you very much.
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I am extremely confident in these picks, which reflect my newfound love of the SEC. I look forward to sitting pretty at 2-3 going into week #2. -- Aggie Mark
And we're off. I had a rush order put on the school internet feed being repaired just so I would not have to explain to Wells how one can get email on a cell phone. Such a conversation would have led to questions about email in general. So... it was a better use of my time to give a rush order to Comcast so I could get my picks in. They were here until 8:00 last night all due to Poolsville. -- Rocket Man
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Regards from the Big O
Football is finally here and these are my picks for this week: 1)South Florida (who knows the first week of football, and ND may have just listened too many ESPN prognosticators); 2)BYU (because the projections that the Black Bears are getting out of the West's cellar are at best imaginary); 3)Oregon (Lee at QB just doesn't get it); 4)Boise State (because this dawg won't hunt either); 5)Maryland (the U doesn't have the players with character to play on through their media storm like a certain team last year). That's it for a lot of upsets and a different attitude towards AU's fellow SEC members this year... learned the hard way. Also, I'm making the picks while taking Hydrocodone.
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It seems that we should have some sort of pool on where each Big XII team ends up. Is it more of will Big XII add a member or dissolve by end of the year? Though with the way this works, they could add a member and then Oklahoma bolts and it dissolves, all in one season. My hope for the Sooners is a 16 member Pac-12. Definitely no SEC (sorry). I don't see a worthwhile option for adding to the Big XII. -- Sean O.
Traveling for work otherwise woulda blown yur shit up with anotha DJ-U Hip Hop Ya' Don't Stop Pick Pic. -- DJ U-Explicit Johnson
S.E.C. Teams have been fighting the West Team's popularity for years. We still do not get the respect we deserve, despite the recent nat'l championships. "What is the Deal"?? Most interesting - Coach Nutt and the surprise flexbone??? Not much of a surprise, or a factor. BYU Wins... -- Al G
As you can tell from my picks, I despise the SEC with all of my being and hope every team has a losing record this year. Go Frogs and go Canes!!! -- G. Berry
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Danny K's Poetry Corner
The time has come
The picks are in
Football season is here.
I've grabbed the remote
Smacked my wife on the ass
And told her to grab me a beer.
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