Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Season Finale Haiku

Since Auburn won the National Champoinship, it will be the season finale of haiku:

Auburn fans gloating
Won't be happening next year
Only won by luck

Friday, January 07, 2011

I ain't calling Wally a liar ...

Reading Wally Hall is occasionally like dabbling in FanFic, that weird subset of writing on the Internet about people's favorite TV shows, just reimagined.

Generally speaking FanFic pieces have Kirk and Spock as boyfriends, or David Duchovny in real life or his "character" from Californication but set in X-Files land.

In a column from Jan. 7, Hall seems set on doing a little FanFic dabbling when he wrote of a chance encounter in New Orleans with a female Alabama fan, who was rooting for Arkansas to win the Sugar Bowl that night.

The start was a sweet moment, one almost impossible to verify, much like Clay Travis's twitter feed that said after the fight on Bourbon Street between an Arkansas fan and an Ohio State fan, a brawl the Arkansas fan won, people who had been watching, began chanting "SEC, SEC."

So is it entirely possible that sitting on a trolley, Hall met someone cheering for Arkansas?

Yes, absolutely.

Then Hall makes a turn into FanFic when he wrote that the same woman, that same Alabama fan, is a United States Attorney and federal prosecutor with working knowledge of a government investigation into the Auburn football program and a pay for play scheme generated by Cam Newton's father?

Umm, no.

For the last six months I've worked as a reporter covering a federal investigation. A very real and multiple state an operation that resulted in lots of plea bargains and convictions in federal court with more trials coming.

An assistant U.S. Attorney isn't authorized to speak to the press without the U.S. Attorney for that district present. And, as a matter of fact, an Assistant U.S. Attorney is much more like to turn and walk the other way when they see a reporter. Trust me, I've seen it happen. Oh Laura Hoey, all I wanted was to talk about Notre Dame football.

But not just that, telling a random stranger, who seems to have identified himself as a member of the press, that she works as a federal prosecutor and is working on an Auburn investigation. It just defies factual description.

FanFic.

Monday, January 03, 2011

pre bowl haiku

Its been a few weeks since I've done a haiku, with the hogs playing in the Sugar Bowl, I had to come up with a new one:
Big ten is winless
Go Hogs beat Ohio St.
Big ten, not all that.