Here are a few from the past that I think are funny. Please add more in the comments.
"Lou Holth ith a penith"
"Tim Brando smells like corndogs"
"OJ stole my other sign"
"Hey Kirk, the SEC voted and it's Vandy's turn to beat Ohio State in a bowl game"
"Corso is my baby daddy"
"Spurrier, once a Gator, always a Cock"
"Masoli for Heistman"
"Say no to Quack"
"Kanye likes Beyonce's sign better"
Friday, September 17, 2010
Thursday, September 16, 2010
Larry Brannan's Arkansas
Sneaking in an LR Razorback game:
An old school primer
Sneaking in an LR Razorback game:
An old school primer
When the sheaf of pages came in the fancy booklet from the athletic czar of many titles, it just seemed so....well, complicated. I remember simpler times when my Razorback (I'm assuming we can still use that word without getting sued) tickets just came in a nice, pouchy envelope with a thank you letter and a schedule magnet. I miss my magnet.
Thumbing through all the propaganda in the spiral-bound notebook, I couldn't help but think if the current fleecing, er Hog Call campaign or whatever the heck it's called, was paying for this overkill of stats, charts, and glossy paper. And I suppose the out-of-state bunch that now oversees all the propaganda campaigns has to keep busy to justify its pork.
When I finally got to my Little Rock season ticket pages (I don't go to Fayetteville any more unless someone comps me) and I slowly began edging my tickets from the perforations, I just couldn't help but think of some of the most glorious Hog games of all. The ones where no ticket was required. The ones where players like Alworth, Hatfield, Phillips, Crockett, Harry Jones, and Burnett roamed the War Memorial turf when it meant something. REALLY meant something.
For a young boy with no money, tickets were no problem. I didn't need to tear them out of a fancy binder. If I wanted to see my heroes play, and I did in the worst way, all it took was the guts to sneak in. I was not alone. There was a whole posse of us and here is how we did it.
Actually there were any number of techniques we Jr. high and high school sneakologists mastered over the years. This was the easiest and most dangerous.
Inside the fence on the north end was a rickety concession stand with a metal roof. I learned early that if you wanted to go over the top with the big boys, and I did, you had to be quick and nimble. Also vigilant for the men in blue. It's amazing what you can get by with when there's a huge crowd. Everyone is in a hurry, drunk, or don't care. And we took advantage of all of that.
Climbing the outside fence in waves at the chosen moment, we would ascend to the top of the concession stand where our footsteps would ricochet loudly off the tin roof and then the dangerous part. I'm not sure how high it was, but once you were on-top, the only way down was to jump off. That's when you were most vulnerable. If you stumbled or fell you were like a crippled animal out in the open, exposing yourself at any second to the vice-grip around your neck from security. I never fell.
Once on the ground, the mad scramble was on to slide down the hill under the end zone seats. Once we made it down the gap under the seats, we helped ourselves to the view at the bottom, peering out from the first row of seats in the end zone for the duration. There was just enough room to sit there. We were part of the atmosphere and really no one cared, except "Red."
Red was a cross between Popeye and one of those bar characters from the first Star Wars film. He was short, ugly and pissed-off a lot. And yes he had red hair. His job was to run us off. He tried, but never succeeded.
We had organization and youth on our side. Plus we were all athletes. When a look-out spied him coming all we did was run up under the seats like rats. He couldn't catch us, and plus he wasn't about to go up under there. We knew it and he knew it, but the game never stopped.
One night Red got too close for comfort. He had this pink skin and his eyes were always glaring and bulging as he would stomp our way. This night as he was cussing us and we scurried back in our hole, he flung something. It was a piece of metal. I will never forget it, and it hit Ricky King. Ricky's nickname was "Hoocho". He wasn't a big guy, but he was tough. It really didn't hurt Ricky, except his pride, and to all our astonishment he came out and confronted the little sawed-off demon jaw-to-jaw. Red backed off.
You know if you really, really think about that kind of stuff today, it almost seems impossible but besides Red and the cops, no one really cared back then. And all the cops would do was toss you out and in a little while, if you were a master, back in you'd go. At the recent Little Rock game I looked fondly down at those spaces under the end zone seats. Now there are barricades there. No way is any kid going to steal one second of precious Razorback game time without paying. REALLY paying.
Probably the most daring sneak-in technique was also the boldest. You had to pick the right dupe. A fatherly type with no kids about to get in line, and then slide-in right in front of him. As you approached the turnstile, your timing had to be prefect. As you pushed forward through the revolving arm, you simply said with a smile and a slight gesture back, "He's got them." Once the ticket-taker shifted his gaze and you cleared the arm, boom.....you were gone in an instant, running as fast as you could to your safe haven under the bleachers. There was no way the ticket-taker could chase you and leave his post. Not with hose rabid fans busting the turnstile to get in.
His call of "Hey come back here!", was laughable as you scurried away successful in your scheme. A determined and driven no-holds scheme to join your fellow crew under the seats to perhaps watch the defending national champions play. Or see a great football game against Standford, Southern Cal or Texas from our on-field perch. The ones we lost still hurt. Funny they don't hurt like that any more.
Did I say I missed my magnet?
Thumbing through all the propaganda in the spiral-bound notebook, I couldn't help but think if the current fleecing, er Hog Call campaign or whatever the heck it's called, was paying for this overkill of stats, charts, and glossy paper. And I suppose the out-of-state bunch that now oversees all the propaganda campaigns has to keep busy to justify its pork.
When I finally got to my Little Rock season ticket pages (I don't go to Fayetteville any more unless someone comps me) and I slowly began edging my tickets from the perforations, I just couldn't help but think of some of the most glorious Hog games of all. The ones where no ticket was required. The ones where players like Alworth, Hatfield, Phillips, Crockett, Harry Jones, and Burnett roamed the War Memorial turf when it meant something. REALLY meant something.
For a young boy with no money, tickets were no problem. I didn't need to tear them out of a fancy binder. If I wanted to see my heroes play, and I did in the worst way, all it took was the guts to sneak in. I was not alone. There was a whole posse of us and here is how we did it.
Actually there were any number of techniques we Jr. high and high school sneakologists mastered over the years. This was the easiest and most dangerous.
Inside the fence on the north end was a rickety concession stand with a metal roof. I learned early that if you wanted to go over the top with the big boys, and I did, you had to be quick and nimble. Also vigilant for the men in blue. It's amazing what you can get by with when there's a huge crowd. Everyone is in a hurry, drunk, or don't care. And we took advantage of all of that.
Climbing the outside fence in waves at the chosen moment, we would ascend to the top of the concession stand where our footsteps would ricochet loudly off the tin roof and then the dangerous part. I'm not sure how high it was, but once you were on-top, the only way down was to jump off. That's when you were most vulnerable. If you stumbled or fell you were like a crippled animal out in the open, exposing yourself at any second to the vice-grip around your neck from security. I never fell.
Once on the ground, the mad scramble was on to slide down the hill under the end zone seats. Once we made it down the gap under the seats, we helped ourselves to the view at the bottom, peering out from the first row of seats in the end zone for the duration. There was just enough room to sit there. We were part of the atmosphere and really no one cared, except "Red."
Red was a cross between Popeye and one of those bar characters from the first Star Wars film. He was short, ugly and pissed-off a lot. And yes he had red hair. His job was to run us off. He tried, but never succeeded.
We had organization and youth on our side. Plus we were all athletes. When a look-out spied him coming all we did was run up under the seats like rats. He couldn't catch us, and plus he wasn't about to go up under there. We knew it and he knew it, but the game never stopped.
One night Red got too close for comfort. He had this pink skin and his eyes were always glaring and bulging as he would stomp our way. This night as he was cussing us and we scurried back in our hole, he flung something. It was a piece of metal. I will never forget it, and it hit Ricky King. Ricky's nickname was "Hoocho". He wasn't a big guy, but he was tough. It really didn't hurt Ricky, except his pride, and to all our astonishment he came out and confronted the little sawed-off demon jaw-to-jaw. Red backed off.
You know if you really, really think about that kind of stuff today, it almost seems impossible but besides Red and the cops, no one really cared back then. And all the cops would do was toss you out and in a little while, if you were a master, back in you'd go. At the recent Little Rock game I looked fondly down at those spaces under the end zone seats. Now there are barricades there. No way is any kid going to steal one second of precious Razorback game time without paying. REALLY paying.
Probably the most daring sneak-in technique was also the boldest. You had to pick the right dupe. A fatherly type with no kids about to get in line, and then slide-in right in front of him. As you approached the turnstile, your timing had to be prefect. As you pushed forward through the revolving arm, you simply said with a smile and a slight gesture back, "He's got them." Once the ticket-taker shifted his gaze and you cleared the arm, boom.....you were gone in an instant, running as fast as you could to your safe haven under the bleachers. There was no way the ticket-taker could chase you and leave his post. Not with hose rabid fans busting the turnstile to get in.
His call of "Hey come back here!", was laughable as you scurried away successful in your scheme. A determined and driven no-holds scheme to join your fellow crew under the seats to perhaps watch the defending national champions play. Or see a great football game against Standford, Southern Cal or Texas from our on-field perch. The ones we lost still hurt. Funny they don't hurt like that any more.
Did I say I missed my magnet?
Tailgate Central
Since people crowded the War Memorial golf course last Saturday, its only fitting I include it with this weeks haiku.
War Memorial
Best tailgating spot around
Party was Rockin'.
War Memorial
Best tailgating spot around
Party was Rockin'.
Pick submission designs of the week
Week 3's contenders for best designs of the week when submitting picks for the top five games. Vote for your favorite.
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Submitted by DJ U-Explicit Johnson
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Live Fan Feedback for the Thursday
Comments on the week from our expert panel of reporters, bankers, doctors, lawyers, ad wizards, lawn guys, bond guys, car guys, pilots, priests, principals, builders, teachers, bums, and nomads.
Continually updated throughout the day...
It pains me to do this because I'm not doing that awful this year, but I'm going to continue my tradition of not picking Arkansas games. -- Brendan O.
Clemson... damn you! Auburn - err Clemson - no, wait Auburn. damn - Auburn - final answer. -- Robb O.
UGA's got nuthin, I just can't see them winning that game... D is clueless and O-Line which was supposed to be so good is only average. I think another shootout, but y'all win by 10. - Jeff K.
I appreciate not being reported for picking Michigan State. I would hate to be excommunicated. -- Chris B.
Ok, I read through all the names on this e-mail, twice... searching and searching, but never finding Dan Ruettiger's name on the Poolsville participants roster. So for the life of me I can't figure out how ND made it into the picks back to back weeks! -- Bizzy G
I have it on good authority that Michael Dyer is starting this week vs Clemson. So, I expect him to get a bunch of carries. -- Aubie Jones
5-0 right? If i were you, I'd just copy my selections for your entry card. -- DJ Jazzy Josh
Moment of Truth: the dice come up snake eyes, and the house wins. I am going with Auburn even though it is lame to have your mascot be the Auburn tiger and still use the "war eagle" before your games - two checks for lame. Well, really. They are so special that they get two mascots. It is like playing with a 4 year old who says they get to have all the superpowers instead of just picking one. For the 4 year old, that is smart thinking. For grown-ups, lame. From now on, I would like the UA to be referred to as both Razorbacks and "War Pterodactyls". We get you from the ground and the sky. And now some big announcement about injury or suspension can come since my picks are in and there are no take backs. -- Kazoo
I don't know if you think the pool would be interested, but I'm working on a show called "Big Ten Icons" that starts airing this Saturday on the Big Ten Network. It's a series documenting the top 20 athletes in Big Ten history. Not just football but all sports. I just finished number 19 and will finish 17 in a week or so. I don't know how many more I'll work on but college sports fans will dig it and the series runs through January or February. -- John R.
Arky (not sure why UGA is favored here, Arky should be favored by 7, even on the road). Texas (lines seems a little light). Notre Dame (I hate to pick them, but I haven't seen MSU play yet). Iowa (another line that seems a bit off). See, no cracks this week either about Arky, even giving them props... of course, we all know that will change in a few weeks. -- Jeff K.
-
Sue Everybody by Glenn B.:
Arkansas does everything it can do lose at Georgia but is thwarted in the end by Georgia's even greater self-destructive tendencies. This game will make last season's Liberty Bowl look like a well-played game in comparison.
Clemson was originally named the University of Clem. Unhappy with the name, the school hired consultants to help them come up with a better name and "Clemson" was the winner. The kicker was the special meaning which the consultants attributed to the added -S-, -O- and -N-: spirit, honor and knowledge (the consultants were not strong spellers). Clemson over Aubrun, bonus points for me.
Texas beats Texas Tech; it is too early in the season for Tulane's former head coach to lose a conference matchup.
Notre Dame, cut to the quick by the home loss to Michigan, defeats Michigan State handily.
-
Can't waste more energy on these. Have to be at a mental peak, ready to give 110 percent (which is impossible, of course) in Athens. Believe coaches and athletes call it "stepping up." -- Dean of Arkansas Sportswriters
-
Come on man. I made these picks by rolling some dice like Mr. Mor-an...
Grew up as an Arkan-san, so gotta roll with Ry-an (Mallett).
Spent four years as a Tex-an, but not that tea sippin' kind, the ones in Aggie-land.
Clem-san can't fondle the Rock on the stand, so gotta go with the team from Auburn, Ala-bam.
Fightin' Lepre-chans from Ire-land gonna go down to the Spar-tans of Michi-gan (State).
With a veter-an QB in Ricky Stan(zi) and a running man named Ad-am (Robinson), you gotta like the Iow-ans.
Respectfully submitted by Man Hat-tan
-
Regards from the Big O:
Without restating my earlier rejoinder to your observation about the magnificent AU victory on the road against an SEC opponent, I must acknowledge that I departed (gravely misguided) from my promise to select teams based upon logic, et al, rather than gut/heart based, when I unfortunately hoped that Joepa's minions could over power the mighty 'lil Nickies... I was wrong and could easily have had a 4-1 last weekend. Anyway, leaving my spilt milk behind I posit the following choices as I prepare to depart tomorrow morning on my way to attend the Tigers' victory (guaranteed since we're both Tigers) Saturday evening at the loveliest village of the plains: 1) Arkansas (yes, I picked the Hogs because they appeared better, even against lesser competition, than the eastern bow wows); 2) Auburn (of course, coupled with we're the better, more tested team playing at home with ESPN Game Day for incentive); 3) Texas (the probably better team, although Tommy's Red Raiders may surprise at home based upon Tub's penchant for wupping up on highly ranked favorites); 4) Michigan State (because the Spartans' Greek warrior is more menacing than the Leprechaun and I haven't been impressed with the Irish's speed); 5) Iowa (because the Big Ten, despite its thick legged slowness is more reliable than any Pac 10 Goldwater Country team no matter what their respective early ratings). Well, time to pack, eat the last of my birthday cake - yes, I'm a young three-and-a-half score geezer - and get my "all-blue" mindset. Ta Ta (hope our 285 pound H Back/Tailback called "Da Da" is over his ankle injury by mid-October's date with the Hogs) and "War Cam Eagle!"
-
Fun with Aubie Jones:
Arkansas - If Arkansas doesn't win against this Georgia team, they are not very good.
Auburn - of course.
Texas Tech - In Tubby's first years at Ole Miss and Auburn, he had bad teams but always seemed to upset a team or two, he will do that this year as well, hopefully this game.
Notre Dame - WTH? We're sick of picking ND games, and their stupid khaki helmets are ridiculous.
Iowa - I don't know who this team is but I'm picking them hoping they'll get lucky, why the heck would you not choose the Neb - Washington game??
-
Iowa - Really, Nebraska routed Arizona by 30 points last year in the Holiday Bowl. -- Husker Do
They wanted it back from O.J., but he had already taken it to the guys of "Pawn Stars." -- Mitchell G.
TxTech over Texas: The Gambler always wins one at home he shouldn't. -- Lee D.
-
Faldon's Other Five Thoughts:
Arkansas — If only to set up a Top 10 battle the following week in Fayetteville. Luckily, Maxine's Tap Room (after 60-plus years of having only beer) has been approved for liquor sales to ease the pain of losing that game. Damn, I've now tipped my hand for next week! Curses!
Auburn — Clemson in the Pool should really be outlawed. And according to the Poolsville Stylebook, it's "Mal-a-zhan."
Texas - Battle for the Chancellor's Spurs!?! Only in Tejas would they come up with something as silly as spurs for a rivalry trophy. The Football Gods weep at such lamosity.
Notre Dame - Battle of the Megaphone!?! I humbly submit my apologies to Texas and Texas Tech.
Iowa - Corn-fed > cactus-bred
Continually updated throughout the day...
It pains me to do this because I'm not doing that awful this year, but I'm going to continue my tradition of not picking Arkansas games. -- Brendan O.
Clemson... damn you! Auburn - err Clemson - no, wait Auburn. damn - Auburn - final answer. -- Robb O.
UGA's got nuthin, I just can't see them winning that game... D is clueless and O-Line which was supposed to be so good is only average. I think another shootout, but y'all win by 10. - Jeff K.
I appreciate not being reported for picking Michigan State. I would hate to be excommunicated. -- Chris B.
Ok, I read through all the names on this e-mail, twice... searching and searching, but never finding Dan Ruettiger's name on the Poolsville participants roster. So for the life of me I can't figure out how ND made it into the picks back to back weeks! -- Bizzy G
I have it on good authority that Michael Dyer is starting this week vs Clemson. So, I expect him to get a bunch of carries. -- Aubie Jones
5-0 right? If i were you, I'd just copy my selections for your entry card. -- DJ Jazzy Josh
Moment of Truth: the dice come up snake eyes, and the house wins. I am going with Auburn even though it is lame to have your mascot be the Auburn tiger and still use the "war eagle" before your games - two checks for lame. Well, really. They are so special that they get two mascots. It is like playing with a 4 year old who says they get to have all the superpowers instead of just picking one. For the 4 year old, that is smart thinking. For grown-ups, lame. From now on, I would like the UA to be referred to as both Razorbacks and "War Pterodactyls". We get you from the ground and the sky. And now some big announcement about injury or suspension can come since my picks are in and there are no take backs. -- Kazoo
I don't know if you think the pool would be interested, but I'm working on a show called "Big Ten Icons" that starts airing this Saturday on the Big Ten Network. It's a series documenting the top 20 athletes in Big Ten history. Not just football but all sports. I just finished number 19 and will finish 17 in a week or so. I don't know how many more I'll work on but college sports fans will dig it and the series runs through January or February. -- John R.
Arky (not sure why UGA is favored here, Arky should be favored by 7, even on the road). Texas (lines seems a little light). Notre Dame (I hate to pick them, but I haven't seen MSU play yet). Iowa (another line that seems a bit off). See, no cracks this week either about Arky, even giving them props... of course, we all know that will change in a few weeks. -- Jeff K.
-
Sue Everybody by Glenn B.:
Arkansas does everything it can do lose at Georgia but is thwarted in the end by Georgia's even greater self-destructive tendencies. This game will make last season's Liberty Bowl look like a well-played game in comparison.
Clemson was originally named the University of Clem. Unhappy with the name, the school hired consultants to help them come up with a better name and "Clemson" was the winner. The kicker was the special meaning which the consultants attributed to the added -S-, -O- and -N-: spirit, honor and knowledge (the consultants were not strong spellers). Clemson over Aubrun, bonus points for me.
Texas beats Texas Tech; it is too early in the season for Tulane's former head coach to lose a conference matchup.
Notre Dame, cut to the quick by the home loss to Michigan, defeats Michigan State handily.
-
Can't waste more energy on these. Have to be at a mental peak, ready to give 110 percent (which is impossible, of course) in Athens. Believe coaches and athletes call it "stepping up." -- Dean of Arkansas Sportswriters
-
Come on man. I made these picks by rolling some dice like Mr. Mor-an...
Grew up as an Arkan-san, so gotta roll with Ry-an (Mallett).
Spent four years as a Tex-an, but not that tea sippin' kind, the ones in Aggie-land.
Clem-san can't fondle the Rock on the stand, so gotta go with the team from Auburn, Ala-bam.
Fightin' Lepre-chans from Ire-land gonna go down to the Spar-tans of Michi-gan (State).
With a veter-an QB in Ricky Stan(zi) and a running man named Ad-am (Robinson), you gotta like the Iow-ans.
Respectfully submitted by Man Hat-tan
-
Regards from the Big O:
Without restating my earlier rejoinder to your observation about the magnificent AU victory on the road against an SEC opponent, I must acknowledge that I departed (gravely misguided) from my promise to select teams based upon logic, et al, rather than gut/heart based, when I unfortunately hoped that Joepa's minions could over power the mighty 'lil Nickies... I was wrong and could easily have had a 4-1 last weekend. Anyway, leaving my spilt milk behind I posit the following choices as I prepare to depart tomorrow morning on my way to attend the Tigers' victory (guaranteed since we're both Tigers) Saturday evening at the loveliest village of the plains: 1) Arkansas (yes, I picked the Hogs because they appeared better, even against lesser competition, than the eastern bow wows); 2) Auburn (of course, coupled with we're the better, more tested team playing at home with ESPN Game Day for incentive); 3) Texas (the probably better team, although Tommy's Red Raiders may surprise at home based upon Tub's penchant for wupping up on highly ranked favorites); 4) Michigan State (because the Spartans' Greek warrior is more menacing than the Leprechaun and I haven't been impressed with the Irish's speed); 5) Iowa (because the Big Ten, despite its thick legged slowness is more reliable than any Pac 10 Goldwater Country team no matter what their respective early ratings). Well, time to pack, eat the last of my birthday cake - yes, I'm a young three-and-a-half score geezer - and get my "all-blue" mindset. Ta Ta (hope our 285 pound H Back/Tailback called "Da Da" is over his ankle injury by mid-October's date with the Hogs) and "War Cam Eagle!"
-
Fun with Aubie Jones:
Arkansas - If Arkansas doesn't win against this Georgia team, they are not very good.
Auburn - of course.
Texas Tech - In Tubby's first years at Ole Miss and Auburn, he had bad teams but always seemed to upset a team or two, he will do that this year as well, hopefully this game.
Notre Dame - WTH? We're sick of picking ND games, and their stupid khaki helmets are ridiculous.
Iowa - I don't know who this team is but I'm picking them hoping they'll get lucky, why the heck would you not choose the Neb - Washington game??
-
Iowa - Really, Nebraska routed Arizona by 30 points last year in the Holiday Bowl. -- Husker Do
They wanted it back from O.J., but he had already taken it to the guys of "Pawn Stars." -- Mitchell G.
TxTech over Texas: The Gambler always wins one at home he shouldn't. -- Lee D.
-
Faldon's Other Five Thoughts:
Arkansas — If only to set up a Top 10 battle the following week in Fayetteville. Luckily, Maxine's Tap Room (after 60-plus years of having only beer) has been approved for liquor sales to ease the pain of losing that game. Damn, I've now tipped my hand for next week! Curses!
Auburn — Clemson in the Pool should really be outlawed. And according to the Poolsville Stylebook, it's "Mal-a-zhan."
Texas - Battle for the Chancellor's Spurs!?! Only in Tejas would they come up with something as silly as spurs for a rivalry trophy. The Football Gods weep at such lamosity.
Notre Dame - Battle of the Megaphone!?! I humbly submit my apologies to Texas and Texas Tech.
Iowa - Corn-fed > cactus-bred
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
Project Playoffs:
Week 2 standings and seedings
Nebraska fans have been recently whining that Boise State wanted $1 million to play in Lincoln after Nebraska offered a two-for-one deal to the Boise athletic department. The crying about $1 million is really lame considering that these major programs regularly pay the Sisters of the Poor $700,000-plus to come to their home stadium and take a beating. So the next time a Nebraska fan boasts that Boise State wouldn't come to Lincoln, remind them that it was actually Nebraska that wouldn't agree to the terms -- not Boise. And why is Nebraska scared to play on the blue turf more than just once? No matter, Nebraska and its fans would be forced to visit Boise, Idaho, for a first-round playoff game as of the Week 2 standings. How great would that be?
Here are the Week 2 standings in realigned conferences with seedings for a 16-team playoff. Seedings are derived from the Massey Comparison Rankings, which take every poll and computer rating into account.
First-round match-ups:
16 Virginia Tech at 1 Alabama
15 Penn State at 2 Ohio State
14 South Carolina at 3 Oregon
13 Utah at 4 Florida
12 Stanford at 5 TCU
11 Nebraska at 6 Boise State
10 LSU at 7 Texas
9 Iowa at 8 Oklahoma
Click here for a full explanation of Project Playoffs.
Southern
1 Alabama (2-0)
10 LSU (2-0)
Auburn (2-0)
Mississippi State (1-1)
Tennessee (1-1)
Ole Miss (1-1)
Southern Miss (1-1)
Vanderbilt (0-2)
Memphis (0-2)
Mid-North
2 Ohio State (2-0)
Michigan (2-0)
Michigan State (2-0)
Cincinnati (1-1)
Notre Dame (1-1)
Illinois (1-1)
Purdue (1-1)
Indiana (1-0)
Louisville (1-1)
Northwest
3 Oregon (2-0)
6 Boise State (1-0)
13 Utah (2-0)
Air Force (2-0)
Oregon State (0-1)
BYU (1-1)
Fresno State (1-0)
Washington (1-1)
Washington State (1-1)
Southeast
4 Florida (2-0)
14 South Carolina (2-0)
Miami (1-1)
Georgia (1-1)
Clemson (2-0)
Georgia Tech (1-1)
Florida State (1-1)
South Florida (1-1)
Central Florida (1-1)
Mid-South
5 TCU (2-0)
7 Texas (2-0)
8 Oklahoma (2-0)
Texas Tech (2-0)
Arkansas (2-0)
Oklahoma State (2-0)
Texas A&M (2-0)
Houston (2-0)
Baylor (2-0)
Midwest
9 Iowa (2-0)
11 Nebraska (2-0)
Wisconsin (2-0)
Missouri (2-0)
Kansas State (2-0)
Kansas (1-1)
Iowa State (1-1)
Colorado (1-1)
Minnesota (1-1)
Southwest
12 Stanford (2-0)
California (2-0)
Arizona (2-0)
USC (2-0)
Arizona State (2-0)
UCLA (0-2)
Hawaii (1-1)
UTEP (1-1)
New Mexico (0-2)
Northeast
15 Penn State (1-1)
Pittsburgh (1-1)
West Virginia (2-0)
Boston College (2-0)
Rutgers (2-0)
Connecticut (1-1)
Navy (1-1)
Syracuse (1-1)
Army (1-1)
Atlantic
16 Virginia Tech (0-2)
North Carolina (0-1)
Kentucky (2-0)
North Carolina State (2-0)
Wake Forest (2-0)
East Carolina (2-0)
Maryland (2-0)
Virginia (1-1)
Duke (1-1)
College football's best five games of Week 3
And now for the Moment of Truth Saturday. After a relatively easy first two weeks, Week 3 looks to present more of a challenge and is one of the rare times when most of the pool's largest and most vocal contingents are represented -- even Vratsinas's Iowa Hawkeyes. It's a moment of truth for all the 2-0 teams to see if they are for real, and it's a moment of truth for the one-loss teams already looking to salvage the season. Is Arkansas the lock fans have been saying they are and will they give Amy S. the chance to say "Take that, DeMillo," or will those who have the strategy of picking against Arkansas get the bigger swing in the standings from a Hog loss because of so many Razorback fans in the pool? Then there's the curious case of Auburn. Typically when I would throw out a crack about points scored against Mississippi State, I would get several protests from the Auburn people. This week, crickets. Have they lost confidence in Malzahn already?
Oh yeah, and most importantly, this week's five includes Clemson as a bonus-point team! (Insert maniacal laugh here.) Roll the dice, brother. Then select your winners and e-mail them back to me by 5 p.m. Friday. As Brother Rufus J. Hogg would say, Hogalueah!
Arkansas - Georgia
11 a.m., Saturday, ESPN
Line: Georgia by 2
Clemson - Auburn
6 p.m., Saturday, ESPN
Line: Auburn by 7
* Underdog worth three points
Battle for the Chancellor's Spurs
Texas - Texas Tech
7 p.m., Saturday, ABC/ESPN2
Line: Texas by 3
Battle for the Megaphone
Notre Dame - Michigan State
7 p.m., Saturday, ABC/ESPN2
Line: Michigan State by 3
Iowa - Arizona
9:30 p.m., Saturday, ESPN
Line: Iowa by 1
Good luck.
****/"\****
Oh yeah, and most importantly, this week's five includes Clemson as a bonus-point team! (Insert maniacal laugh here.) Roll the dice, brother. Then select your winners and e-mail them back to me by 5 p.m. Friday. As Brother Rufus J. Hogg would say, Hogalueah!
Arkansas - Georgia
11 a.m., Saturday, ESPN
Line: Georgia by 2
Clemson - Auburn
6 p.m., Saturday, ESPN
Line: Auburn by 7
* Underdog worth three points
Battle for the Chancellor's Spurs
Texas - Texas Tech
7 p.m., Saturday, ABC/ESPN2
Line: Texas by 3
Battle for the Megaphone
Notre Dame - Michigan State
7 p.m., Saturday, ABC/ESPN2
Line: Michigan State by 3
Iowa - Arizona
9:30 p.m., Saturday, ESPN
Line: Iowa by 1
Good luck.
****/"\****
Monday, September 13, 2010
Ramon's Escoblog: Week 2
Sunday, September 12, 2010
Bits and Pieces, Week 2
Ho HU(l)M
Arkansas won and looked absolutely average Saturday night. For a team that some would like to think is a darkhorse contender for the national title, one touchdown in the first half against the Fighting Bubby Brister's isn't going to get it done.
Sure, the final score looks good and Ryan Mallett had the numbers, again, to impress but as we were watching it, the cunning genius of ULM d-c Umm, ol' what's his name, had the Razorbacks offense on the ropes with a 3-3-5 scheme.
It wasn't just that, the Brister's were actually running a two-deep with help in the flats and no deep help, or at least that's what I could tell from watching it on Fox Sports South.
Not to go off into football jibberish, but that's pretty daring for a team playing a quarterback like Mallett and a clue that ULM took this game more seriously as a tune-up than the Piggies.
Pounding a meme
Fox Sports wouldn't shut up about how Arkansas was going to establish its power running game. The state-wide daily wrote the same thing. (Maybe they shared notes?)
Yeah, that didn't work out so well.
For all of Broderick Green's 250 pounds, he sure can't get one yard when Arkansas needs it.
And who is playing fullback?
Four players deep at tailback and not a single consistent player in the bunch, the lack of a pound it running game is going to cost Arkansas at least two games this season.
For all the flash and sizzle of a consistent 400-yard passer, you need at least one decent back or the defense keys on the quarterback and the offense goes into the dumpster.
James Madison, a great patriot
James Madison University beat Virginia Tech on Saturday. By five points in miserable conditions and the Hokies were going on five days rest.
No excuses, but a really good I-AA usually makes it interesting when they play a big-name I-A. Best example is Appy State taking down Michigan or, more recently, Jacksonville State beating Ole Miss.
It happens.
More pressing is the ripple effect on a team like Boise State and its chances for playing in the national title game. The voting coaches are already looking for any reason to drop Boise in the polls and this is a reason.
The Hokies might roll to 10-2 and the ACC's automatic qualifier but it won't matter for the Boise haters.
Strap one on
So what's up with all the flying helmets?
No, seriously.
Watching a full day of college football on Saturday and it was raining helmets. They still use chin straps, or at least it looks like they do.
It used to be that when you'd put your helmet on, an equipment guy would stick an air pump in and inflate the cushioning to create a custom fit. But that doesn't seem like it is happening with all the helmets flying off.
It might be some concussion thing, a way to prevent head injuries, but that seems counter intuitive watching guys make tackles with no helmet on.
Around the country
4 Meechigan used an improbable game from its quarterback to beat Notre Dame. Guy rolled up 502 yards of total offense.
4 The ACC is one of the best six leagues in the country, right? All that happened on Saturday was its four best teams got their asses handed to them by college football teams of all stripes. Maybe North Carolina can still save, oh never mind. The Tar Heels are angling for the death penalty instead of being a good football team.
4 Georgia rebounds to its loss to South Carolina by shutting down Mallett and the Hogs next week in Athens as the Dawgs run and run to 1 and 1 in the SEC.
4 Stanford looked pretty awesome against UCLA in the late game. And Oregon made Tennessee look a little silly once the Ducks got used to playing in the water, I mean rain.
Fan feedback fast
From the Facebook, Saturday night:
"A win is a win." – Poolsville regular Brendan Oman on Arkansas beating ULM
"Ain't no way we beat GA next week. Defense just ain't strong enough! I hope I'm wrong…." – Poolsville reader and dedicated Hog fan Kevin Benson, who doubles as an ace caterer and trust me, his meat is delicious
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